The internship I obtained right before graduating ended with no available full-time positions. Therefore, I had to make ends meet until I found something else. I moved from J.O.B. to J.O.B. until the attacks. That unfortunate tragedy caused a flood of now unemployed, yet more experienced, desperate people to hit the job market, taking any job they could find even if they were overqualified. No one in my sector was hiring recent college graduates with just a year of experience, not to mention a minority female. So I had to make due.
I found a job at a supermarket. My experience in retail as I worked my way through school, supporting myself as well as assisting my parent, made me confident that I could work anywhere to make ends meet if need be. This was one of those times, as I was living on my own with plenty of bills to pay. Although my starting salary wasn't what I had hoped it would be, it would do until I started up a career.
The hiring process was grueling. Part of my training included a few months of me traveling to a part of New Jersey that I had never heard of. Day after day I wondered if the company was just testing me to see what hardships I would put up with for this job. But, I was young and strong. I didn't let anything bother me.
Once the location I was hired for opened and my actual position was ready, everything was peachy. I was getting along with my co-workers as well as my superiors. I had input into the workings of the store as well as supervisory power over part of the staff. My actual job consisted of 5 different positions rolled into 1. But we were a "boutique" supermarket, was the excuse. Again, I rolled with the punches.
Things started to sour once the superiors realized I was qualified for a much higher position. The more I showed my skill at managing others and efficiently working my shift, the more they tried to take my power away. I clashed with my superiors once our General Manager was transferred. Under the new General Manager, things turned into a game of semantics over what my duties and power actually were. I had been there for years without an issue. Suddenly the new General Manager began playing of game of how to make me quit.
Then my saga began. I remember the day clearly. The week before, there had been a confrontation about the evening shift (my shift) doing more to ease the burden of the morning shift (which had no burden). After explaining practically minute-by-minute exactly why the evening shift did not have additional time to do the entire day's work leading to no need for a morning shift, things settled down. The week hadn't gone too badly. I actually thought to myself that if it wasn't for my superiors deliberately trying to get me to quit, I could see the advantage of working at that job for a very long time.
The particular day in question was a typical day. It was early October 2003, and things were running smoothly. Towards the end of the shift, I actually had about 10 minutes to spare. Despite the voice in my gut, I decided to be nice and take on a task that I had every right to leave for the morning shift. As I only had about 10 minutes before I had to move on with my closing duties, I couldn't really be leisurely about this task. My gut kept screaming at me not to do it. But I wanted to be the better person and show that, yes, when we have the time, the evening shift could do extra. So I ignored my instincts and did the task.
Because a worker from another department was being careless, there was no sign to warn me about the floor that was both too wet and too soapy. The floor was designed with a pebbled surface that gave no hint that it was anything but dry. As I went about taking care of what should have been a morning job, without warning and with my hands full, my feet went out from under me.
I didn't have time to realize what happened or understand why I was suddenly sitting on the floor, my work pants soaked. As with many sudden injuries (because of the body's way of helping you flee danger) the pain didn't register right away. I thought I was fine. People slip and fall everyday without injury. So, I got up and went on with my duties, or at least tried to. However, as the adrenaline wore off, the pain started to register. It came on slow and then got to a point where I really couldn't think clearly. I couldn't believe what I was feeling.
As the EMT workers were lifting me into the ambulance, I was still trying to figure out why I hurt so bad after merely falling down. People fall every day and get back up and go on like nothing happened. But for me, that trip to the emergency room almost 10 years ago would be the beginning of a long journey that I am still trying to heal from. My life has not been the same since.
Next post: Diagnosis and a year from hell.
